Last week I had an especially daunting week as a Mom. I had a few days that felt extremely painful to just get through, much less be the usual fun and fully present Mom and Wife that I typically strive to be.
I felt really disengaged from my daughter and was in a funk that I just couldn’t seem to snap out of. l felt so guilty that I wasn’t being the best Mom I could be.
When I thought about it, I realized that I haven’t had a lot of ‘me time’ lately to just be with my own thoughts or spend time on my passions outside of being a Mom.
My sweet hubby offers all the time to be on Little Miss duty so I can get a break and either get out of the house by myself or have some relaxation time at home, but I rarely ever take him up on it.
Sometimes I almost feel like I shouldn’t be allowed breaks. I chose to be a work-from-home Mom and be fully entrenched in the chaos that our days typically are, so most of the time I feel like I just need to own it, suck it up, and put my big girl pants on and deal with it.
But you know what? That attitude is clearly having a poor effect on me not only as a Mom, but in my life overall. When I don’t make time for myself, I feel drained and completely depleted, with nothing left of myself to give my baby girl.
She deserves me being the best Mom I can possibly be to her, and it’s not fair to her (or me) to be any less than that.
In order to do that, I’ve realized that I need to embrace the concept of making time for myself.
It is no coincidence that I decided to order a copy of Jessica Turner’s fantastic book The Fringe Hours last week (thank you Amazon Prime – two day shipping is my lifesaver!). I had heard quite a few good reviews from others who had read it and I thought that I needed to read it too after the past week I’ve had.
Jessica asks, “Ever get to the end of the day and realize you did nothing for you?” Umm yes! Are you reading my mind?!
I completely devoured the book this past weekend and I just have to say, it might be one of my favorite books I’ve ever read. The timing couldn’t have been better for me, I just felt like this book really spoke to me and how overwhelmed and depleted I’ve been feeling lately.
This book encourages you to take back the fringe hours – those little pockets of time you already have in your day – in order to make time for your passions and practice self-care.
- Being everything for everyone is not sustainable.
- Self-care should be considered a necessity, not a privilege like I’ve been allowing it to be.
- I felt compelled to drop the guilt I tend to feel when I take time for myself to do whatever I please. Too often I feel as though I should be filling that time with work, housework, or any of the other responsibilities that I have under my belt.
The chapter about embracing help was one that especially spoke to me.
I have been juggling too much on my plate for far too long and have been playing around with the idea of getting some extra help, perhaps in the form of part-time daycare for Little Miss (so I can get my work done during that time) and a cleaning service once a month or so.
While I’m not sure when I will be able to bring this help on board, I felt like I was getting a permission slip and being told that it’s okay to ask for or hire help when you need it.
Embracing help doesn’t mean that I’m weak or incapable, it means that I’m thinking smarter and more strategically about how my time is spent.
What I loved about The Fringe Hours:
- There are various sections throughout the book that allow you some space to work through the tips being given and figure out how to best apply them to your own life. It’s like having a little workbook built into the book, and I really enjoyed filling it out as I went. It allowed me to immediately apply the advice being given to my own life.
- There were plenty of ideas for ways to not only create more time for myself, but to make the most of that time as well.
The importance of making time for yourself
I think I really learned a great lesson this past week that taking care of yourself is one of the most important gifts you can give your children and anyone else who is special in your life.
‘Me time’ is so important for not only Mamas, but for everyone. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by all that tasks that accompany our day-to-day lives.
Having that precious and important time to yourself helps you to recharge your batteries so that you do have something to give back to your loved ones at the end of the day.
I’ve discovered that being a Mom can be compared to being the gas tank in your car. If you give, give, give without replenishing your own energy stores, you’re going to find yourself run down and crazed on the side of the road 😉 .
I’m giving you permission to start making time for yourself – and most importantly, not feel one ounce of guilt for doing so!
If you have been struggling to juggle everything on your plate lately and feeling like you need some inspiration and encouragement to make a big change in your life and reclaim your time as your own, I definitely encourage you to read The Fringe Hours.
It’s been a very eye-opening source of inspiration for me to make drastic changes in my own life, and I’m so grateful for it!
Do you already make great use of your fringe hours, or are you like me, realizing that you need to make a drastic change and start making more time for yourself to pursue your passions and practice self-care?
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