I had a job that I was miserable at right before I began doing my freelance work a few years ago. I loved many of my co-workers and clients, but the lack of a work-life balance and the awful commute were killing me. I was working an insane amount of hours each week and then had a commute where I drove 1-2 hours each way.
My experience actually ended up turning into something positive because it gave me the push I needed to start my freelance business and be able to work from home, but it is still fresh in my mind how being stuck in a job you are miserable at can become downright depressing and consuming.
I developed some strategies for coping with a miserable job that really helped me, and I hope you find these helpful as well!
How to cope with a job you hate:
1. Stop venting
You may think that venting with coworkers or hashing out every little detail of what you hate about your job is going to make you feel better, but you are actually doing the exact opposite. Venting is a fancy name for complaining, and complaining too much or focusing on every element of your job that you can’t stand is actually going to leave you feeling more miserable.
Perhaps you are establishing some camaraderie with your fellow employees through your vent sessions, but have you ever actually left your chats feeling better about your current situation? I would bet money that you haven’t.
2. Figure out why you hate your job
This may seem like common sense, but really give some thought as to what truly bothers you at your job. Is it your boss? The culture? Lack of a challenge? Too much stress? Not a good work-life balance? If you dig deep and figure out where your dislike for your job stems from, it might be something that you can actually change through a simple conversation with your manager or someone else at your company.
3. Change your attitude
Thing could always be worse, and it’s important to keep that in perspective. For instance, you could be among the 9 million Americans currently unemployed. It’s not to say that your feelings aren’t valid or that you should continue on at a job you can’t stand, but an attitude adjustment can really do wonders for how you view your current situation.
4. Focus on the positives
Maybe you love your co-workers but hate the work itself. If that’s the case, make more of an effort to get together with your co-workers during your lunch or other breaks. Having little things like that to look forward to will help get you through the day on a more positive note. I came out of a miserable situation with some lifelong friendships that I made with my co-workers at the time. I couldn’t imagine my life without them now!
No matter what it may be for you, there really is always a silver lining to every situation. Don’t fail to see it!
5. Take advantage of breaks
Don’t skip your lunch hour or other breaks offered to you during the day. Take advantage of that time to go for a quick walk outside to get some fresh air and clear your mind. Eating lunch at your desk everyday isn’t a healthy habit – physically or mentally. If you bring your lunch, make it a point to go to the office cafeteria or kitchen to eat for a nice change of scenery. When you come back to your desk, you’ll be feeling more refreshed and ready to conquer the afternoon.
6. Don’t bring work home
This isn’t referring to the physical sense of work as in paperwork, but rather not letting your negative disposition towards your job affect your personal life. I remember coming home from work and my hellish commute feeling absolutely miserable. The first few months I would sulk all night about how much I was dreading the next morning and having to go and do it all over again.
I eventually learned how to turn off my “work” mode once I got home and it did wonders for my personal life, especially my relationship with my Husband since I stopped being such a crab all the time.
7. Find joy in other areas of your life
Work is what you do, not who you are. There is more to you than just the title you have at your job. Learn how to create happiness in other areas of your life. Just because you dislike the job you are at for 8+ hours a day, doesn’t mean that you have to be miserable the other 16 hours you aren’t there. Life is too short for that!
8. Start looking elsewhere
If you are so miserable that you can’t stand one more day and there’s nothing you can change to help you enjoy your job, then take action! All the complaining in the world isn’t going to change your situation unless you do something about it. Looking for a new job isn’t accepting defeat, you deserve to enjoy what you do for a living. Just realize that it might take some time to find something else that will be a good fit for you. In the meantime, try to make the best out of your current situation by taking advantage of these strategies for coping.
Do you currently have, or have you ever had a job you hated? What were some of the ways you helped yourself cope?
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It sounds like our situations were similar. I liked my old 9-5 job but it was all-consuming. I had a terrible work-life balance. My strategy was to grown my online “side” income so I could leave and that’s exactly what I did. I don’t miss my old job at all, but I do miss a few select people =)
That’s so fantastic that you were able to accomplish your goal Holly! You’re a wonderful example for anyone else out there looking to create a full-time salary from their side hustle!
I hate my job because I’m tired of being an admin; even though it’s a decent job with good pay and a light work load, I want something more fulfilling. I’m trying to build up enough money in my savings to enable me to quit, but it’s a slow uphill climb.
I can certainly understand that, it’s tough when you feel like you are capable of doing a lot more than what’s being given to you. You’ve got this, Meredith! Where there’s a will, there’s a way 🙂
I was in this situation before having my daughter and I implied a lot of your strategies! The biggest for me was focusing on the positives. I would go in and get my work done and look forward to walks and lunch breaks with my coworkers and, of course, the salary that the job provided me. In any job it’s so easy to focus on the negative, but you’re only hurting yourself by doing that.
Absolutely Sarah! Focusing on the positives can make any situation seem not as terrible.
Being at job that you dislike is the worst and I’ve been there with my old job and if someone is seriously unhappy at work they should consider leaving because life is too short. But sometimes it’s not that easy and we all depend on the money we make at work. When I worked at my old job that I couldn’t stand, I just kept reminding myself that the situation was temporary and I would be moving on at the right time. My nice coworkers also helped lighten my mood and make work more enjoyable. Now I’m very happy and content with my job. The commute sucks (about 45 minutes) but I’ll be moving closer in 3 months so I’m excited about that.
Agreed Chonce! Glad to hear you are enjoying your current work. I also think that if you enjoy what you do, then the commute seems a lot more bearable as well. That’s great that you’ll be closer though, more time with your family! 🙂
This is fabulous. I’m on the verge of a job decision that I’m afraid I’ll totally dislike and regret taking. Thanks for such good perspective!
So total coincidence– I wrote a post today on why our careers don’t (or shouldn’t) define who we are. Great minds think alike!
Thanks Daisy! I was there too – I was honestly petrified of putting in my notice at my office job to start doing my freelance work. I mulled it over and over, it wasn’t a decision that was easy for me to make at the time because I was also worried that I would regret it and realize I had made a mistake.
In my personal experience, I’ve had zero regrets with my job change. If anything, I regret not doing it sooner!
Oh how fabulous, I’m heading over right now to read 🙂 thanks for sharing!
This is very interesting!
Even with a job you like, there can be “bad” days. I try to remind myself of all the positives, as you wisely recommend.
My work is 100% freelance and 75% from home. I wouldn’t change that for anything in the world. 🙂
Very true Julie! Nothing can be wonderful all of the time, so it’s important to keep it all in perspective!
I love your positivity! I used to have a friend at work who could find the good in anything. I think you are her in disguise! 🙂
Thank you Kay! I am definitely not the most positive person I know, but I sure do try hard to overcome my inner pessimist to see the beauty in everything! 🙂
I’d love to be positive, but us older workers have very few choices. I’m over 55 and have found that looking for a new job is terribly frustrating. No one gives me a chance to prove what I can do because I am not a fresh-faced 20 something. They just look at me as a risk and not as a potential gold mine of experience and talent. My current job is almost unbearable at well over 100 hours a week, awful company culture, bosses that are manipulative, condescending and narcissistic, and new ownership that is using us as a debit dump for their bad product choices. Every week I have to talk myself up out of the dumps and try to work on job hunting on the weekends. It is so hard to find anything when you are old. My goal at this point is to just survive for a little while longer.
Aw I’m so sorry to hear that you are struggling! It really is such a shame that you are not being valued for all of the years of experience and knowledge you bring to the table. I hope you are able to find something that is better suited to your time and talents, and until then…hang in there!!
It means a lot to know that I’m not the only one who felt trapped. My job has actually made me gain insane amounts of weight and plummet into serious depression. Without venting, I can’t take it anymore. While reading this article I realized that the majority of these suggestions weren’t something I can do. Until I got to the last one…. Thank you again.
Aw you bet Gwen! I hope you find peace and happiness in wherever your career takes you!!